Dry Cleaning Adventures
by The Surreal Cereal Killer
Summary: Elijah takes a trip to the neighbourhood dry cleaning service. What could possibly go wrong? One-shot.


Elijah trudged through the streets of New Orleans carrying four of his expensive suits in his hands. The suits were drenched in blood from a physical fight with Niklaus earlier today and from previous fights. A pang of annoyance settled on his features as he pulled open the door to a dry cleaning service.

The scent of the place struck Elijah immediately. With his enhanced scent, the dreadful smell of the room infiltrated his nostrils. He wrinkled his nose in disgust.

The lights in the room were flashing wildly with a few bulbs burnt out.

There was an old lady seated on a chair reading a newspaper near the entrance. It had been a while since Elijah saw a physical newspaper.

A female teenager was seated behind a counter with plenty of clothing in plastic covers hung on a rack. A small bell rested on the counter along with an opened can of pop. The girl was on her smartphone, furiously texting somebody. Anger was etched on her youthful face.

Elijah approached the countertop while clutching his bloodstained suits. The girl didn't notice Elijah's presence as she madly messaged somebody.

Elijah pressed his finger lightly on the bell's button.

The girl finally noticed him and pointed her index finger to the ceiling, as if she was saying 'one moment please'.

Elijah patiently waited for the girl to finish up her text.

The girl put her phone down on the countertop and looked irked at the new customer.

"Can I, like, help you?" The girl asked in a bored tone with a hint of anger.

"Yes―" Elijah paused to read the small nametag sewn onto her shirt, "―Britney, I would like to get these articles of clothing cleaned please. I will pick these up under the name Elijah Smith." He placed his suits up on the counter. The freshly stained suit still dripped blood onto the counter.

Britney eyed the suits suspiciously. She took the four suits and walked to the concealed back room to get them cleaned. While walking, she examined the bloodstains curiously.

While Britney was gone, Elijah curiously stared at Britney's unlocked phone on the counter. The girl had been very obnoxious towards him for no reason. He debated whether or not to mess with the clueless teenager. He chose the former.

He gingerly picked up the small cellphone. Glowing brightly from the screen was a conversation between Britney and a 'Joel'. He read the conversation in his head.

 **Britney: omfg joel, I literally can't believe u sometimes! :(**

 **Joel: Britney calm down! It was just one night!**

 **Britney: that doesn't give u an excuse too, like, cheat. Im so fcking disappointed in u.**

Elijah grimaced at the troubles of the two lovebirds and grammatical errors. He typed out a new message and sent it.

 **Britney: Never mind Joel, I forgive u. How about I take you out for a romantic dinner? Ill pay ;)**

Elijah chuckled as he purposely spelled out typos and an emoticon to masquerade as Britney. Teenagers these days were so strange.

He focused on the movement of Britney with his vampire hearing. She was slowly approaching the counter. Elijah scrolled the messages up to cover his new text while placing the phone back where he got it.

Britney emerged from the back room and advanced towards Elijah.

"You clothing will be ready in 3 hours. Come back later." Britney said quickly.

Elijah nodded. "Thank you." He turned and walked towards the exit.

Britney sighed in content as she picked up her phone once again. She dialled Joel's phone number to confront him.

The old lady from earlier was still seated in a chair, but she was sleeping now. Her face was planted on top of the newspaper resting on her lap. Quiet snores could be heard from her.

Elijah paused to witness Britney's reaction to the message he sent. He gently pushed the old lady's head up from her lap and took the newspaper to not seem suspicious. He pretended to read the newspaper and listened to Britney's conversation.

"Britney, what the hell is wrong with you? Why did you even suggest a date? We're freaking siblings!" a male voice nearly shouted through the cellphone.

"I didn't send that! I swear." Britney protested.

"Don't you have a password on your phone? Who else could it be?"

Elijah's eyes widened as he realized what he had done. He hadn't expected this outcome, though, he was very satisfied. He put the newspaper he had been holding back onto the old lady's lap.

Elijah tried holding in his laughter as he quietly slipped through the exit of the building.

The door closed with a small thud.


End file.
